Fissures

This election, it’s driven fissures in country, in government and in families.

I’ve been arguing, off an on, with my own family all day. Not the ones I live with who know me dearly and love me for all of who I am. (it’s been so much FUN!!)

No, the ones that raised me.

After the night, when I waited, with so many others like me, for the results of the US election… you know… the one that would tell us if we were safe or not, I posted on my personal facebook page. I unfriended anyone who had declaimed they’d voted for him. Even my childhood best friend. My eyelids burned with shed tears and my nose ached from wiping it all night as I wrote the personal message to her. Explaining why I had to cut off a connection we’d had for decades.

I didn’t get a wink of sleep that night, and it took me a day to recover, (if I even have) I still tear up at thinking about it. I had to explain to my daughter last night, why almost half of an entire country didn’t think she was worth protecting. (Thank Gods we live in Canada) My only answer was that so many people like to see what isn’t there.

My family sure did.

A vast majority of the people who raised me, the people who should KNOW me, deeply and support me, regardless. They voted for Trump.

I’m out about who I am. I’m several of the letters of LGBTTQQIAA2sP acronym, I’m disabled, I’m mentally ill, I’m… ugh. I’m so many things Frump directly campaigned against.

I’ve been campaigning against my family since I was old enough to know they were wrong. (Especially about race… we pass… obviously, but we’re passing. We need to use that privilege to do better… not. Not this.)

I campaigned for them to vote for Hillary. Not because they LIKED her (honestly, I didn’t like her either, I wanted Bernie, I still voted for Hillary) but to protect ME.

To protect my dearest, closest friends, who also tend to fall on the LGBTTQQIAA2sP spectrum somewhere, and if they don’t, they’re PoC, or they’re, or they’re, yeah that.

They didn’t protect me.

The reaction to my declaration was immediate and evident. I knew it was coming, and I won’t be silent, or nice, or private anymore.

I’m not… by nature, a fighter. Being socially awkward and aspie… I tend to avoid confrontation.

No more. Trump voters brought the fight to my doorstep. To MY life. I will try with all of my heart to fight the battle with love, but by all I hold holy. I. Will. Fight.

In a few days, we’re going to start seeing the inevitable decline of interest in this battle. It’s human nature and we shouldn’t blame people for that. We’re firefly beings, our interest and commitment passes, quickly.

Mine won’t. I may need to step back from time to time to recharge, we should all of us make time for that, or we WILL burn out. But this war against equality is on me, more than it ever has been before. I will fight.

One of the ways I fight is by choosing to help people defend themselves against stupidity and prejudice. My friend, Erin Jeffreys Hodges, is having a bad time with that right now.

 

 

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